Goodbye

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Scarlett778

Scarlett778

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Hi Everyone,

I wanted to let you guys know that I will be leaving Chicago Reefs. Many of you guys may not care but I would like to express the reason why I will be leaving and maybe this will spread and effect everyone on how to speak to people respectively.

Many of the people and sponsors that I have met either face to face or chatted on the forum has been very nice and cordial. I like hearing everyone's opinion on things and also have learned many ways to operate and take care of my reef aquarium. But there are the few that have been very rude and has left a bad taste in my mouth and has overall has ruined my experience with Chicago Reefs, either if it was name calling, their opinion mattered over everyone else's, pointing fingers, harassment to me and my husband, etc... Seriously, this has got to go if you want this to be a successful forum.

I believe you can have a healthy debate but does proving that you are right by stomping on anyone who even try to make a suggestion is completely disrespectful. This should be a peaceful community and learn from one another and not one-up each other to feel powerful.

I'm not great with explanations but I wanted people to just understand the repercussions that has come to my decision and make some of you second think on how you act and talk to other people.

I'm sure I'll see many of you guys either at the swaps and in reef central. Once the childish acts has receded, I will come back to this place and also provide my support once again.

Take Care,
Tammy
 
Unfortunately you are not hurting anybody but yourself by leaving the forum. Best of luck to you in your reefing.
 
Sorry to hear that, but trust me, we are a small sample compared to RC. The few you think are rude here, it's magnified tenfold when you go to a bigger forum, any forum. when you have 1 jerk here, there's 10 more of those jerks in a national forum.
Take some time off here maybe, cool off, them come back :)
 
Hey Tammy,
don't go, we will miss you..My sister name Tammy too. don't go sis..I had that experience too. but heck, don't care about them. just don't talk to those jerks, ignore them. Life is suck, but there some good thing is waiting.
I love to learn from you..
I agree with ColaAddict...
 
ColaAddict said:
Sorry to hear that, but trust me, we are a small sample compared to RC. The few you think are rude here, it's magnified tenfold when you go to a bigger forum, any forum. when you have 1 jerk here, there's 10 more of those jerks in a national forum.
Take some time off here maybe, cool off, them come back :)
Click to expand...

haha I may take your route due to that I can't take myself off this forum. I don't know how to! haha

Lil BamBam said:
You are back :D I haven't seen you for weeks...


One bad apple caused all this thread??? Come on!!! No need for a goodbye :( Just disregard the post and move on. Dont go!!! Help build CR
Click to expand...

I wouldn't be so angry if it was just one post, it's many and I see with others. And also with accusations. Seriously, childish stuff.

Sorry for the drama guys
 
Hi Tammy-
Dont leave rather take a break. I hate for you or anyone else leave CR.

"When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. "
~ Franklin D. Roosevelt
 
I see were you are coming from and I totally understand you. Everybody has the people they like and dislike everywhere. Don't go! Like some said, just disregard those kind of people. That's what I do. Yes there are some people that I just can't stand but we all have to grow up and learn to take up with it. Life isn't fair and just because a few bad apples are making your life miserable around here you don't have to go. Ignore them and try and avoid them when you see them around. I don't know you personally but I would hate for a great Chicagoan reefer to disappear from around here. C'mon guys and girls, let's all work together as the community we are and stop all the BS. Let's grow up. I know we sometimes let our emmotions and egos get in our ways but we gotta learn to control them. Well that's enough for my speech and I hope we can all start getting along and acting like the adults we are. :D
 
DJE2010 said:
Hi Tammy-
Dont leave rather take a break. I hate for you or anyone else leave CR.

"When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. "
~ Franklin D. Roosevelt
Click to expand...

Appropriate quote! Do what you feel is best, but we will miss having you here if you decide to go.
 
Wow, I guess I missed the "thread" that generated this. I'm still pretty new here, but feel the group has been very open and helpful. I agree with what has been said already, take a break and keep a positive perspective. Don't let others keep you away from something you obviously love.

-Don
 
Hi Tammy - Sorry to hear about your thinking of leaving. I hope you will reconsider. This is a great community of people with an interest and passion for reefing. I would hate to loose your very important perspective and contribution to the community.

To those others who annoy you... Ignore them! To the CR Team, perhaps there should be a Good Karma and Bad Karma voting button. Perhaps people would get a little more civil here.

Tammy, don't leave! Stick around.. and ignore those who you dislike!

Dan
 
The Karma button does work both ways, but IME it unfortunately is far too easily abused for petty vengeance or to take yet another stab at other members that disagree. I believe that with time, a persons own posts and experiences that are absorbed by other members will be more valuable than some inaccurate Karma rating.
 
FishBeard said:
The Karma button does work both ways, but IME it unfortunately is far too easily abused for petty vengeance or to take yet another stab at other members that disagree. I believe that with time, a persons own posts and experiences that are absorbed by other members will be more valuable than some inaccurate Karma rating.
Click to expand...

Agreed!
 
Scarlett778 said:
Hi Everyone,

I wanted to let you guys know that I will be leaving Chicago Reefs. Many of you guys may not care but I would like to express the reason why I will be leaving and maybe this will spread and effect everyone on how to speak to people respectively.

Many of the people and sponsors that I have met either face to face or chatted on the forum has been very nice and cordial. I like hearing everyone's opinion on things and also have learned many ways to operate and take care of my reef aquarium. But there are the few that have been very rude and has left a bad taste in my mouth and has overall has ruined my experience with Chicago Reefs, either if it was name calling, their opinion mattered over everyone else's, pointing fingers, harassment to me and my husband, etc... Seriously, this has got to go if you want this to be a successful forum.

I believe you can have a healthy debate but does proving that you are right by stomping on anyone who even try to make a suggestion is completely disrespectful. This should be a peaceful community and learn from one another and not one-up each other to feel powerful.

I'm not great with explanations but I wanted people to just understand the repercussions that has come to my decision and make some of you second think on how you act and talk to other people.

I'm sure I'll see many of you guys either at the swaps and in reef central. Once the childish acts has receded, I will come back to this place and also provide my support once again.

Take Care,
Tammy
Click to expand...

honestly if you get this upset over the actions of a few people on a forum, you really shouldn't be on the internet at all. If you cant handle anonymous name calling, those who presume to always be correct, or useless arguments, you shouldn't be on a forum at all. And IMO those are all things that make the internet fun, not necessarily fun for the family, but who says it needs to be.

Honestly I hate posts like these. If you truly want to leave this site then just go. There is no need for a goodbye song and dance, unless your goal is attention (not saying that it is, just implying so). If you want to say goodbye, do so privately to those that you knew or the site staff.
I also hate anything passive aggressive, if you wish to use "members actions" as your scapegoat for leaving, then either say what they were or don't mention it at all. Being vague does not help the site correct these members actions, nor does it do anything constructive.

on that note,
toodles :wave:
 
WeePee said:
honestly if you get this upset over the actions of a few people on a forum, you really shouldn't be on the internet at all. If you cant handle anonymous name calling, those who presume to always be correct, or useless arguments, you shouldn't be on a forum at all. And IMO those are all things that make the internet fun, not necessarily fun for the family, but who says it needs to be.

Honestly I hate posts like these. If you truly want to leave this site then just go. There is no need for a goodbye song and dance, unless your goal is attention (not saying that it is, just implying so). If you want to say goodbye, do so privately to those that you knew or the site staff.
I also hate anything passive aggressive, if you wish to use "members actions" as your scapegoat for leaving, then either say what they were or don't mention it at all. Being vague does not help the site correct these members actions, nor does it do anything constructive.

on that note,
toodles :wave:
Click to expand...

With that said, perhaps certain members should go back and re-read the general forum rules... Particularly #2 #3 and the early part of #12. I honestly can not believe someone would be so rude as to post what you just did. I couldn't for the life of me ever seeing someone saying something like this without expecting to get puched in the nose for it.

Your post very honestly should have been left unsaid.

Here is a link to the forum rules in case anyone doesn't know where to find it: http://www.chicagoreefs.com/forums/showthread.php?t=1299
 
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